Little Purple Fooshballs

Hello?

2008-09-07T20:24:00.002-06:00

Is this thing still on? Donnie? Pursey? Dizzi? Bobby?

Damn! I feel like Adam at the Cartwright Family Reunion. . . .

Hillary Clinton: Cookie Monster?

2008-01-08T10:17:00.000-06:00

Rudy in Disguise

2007-10-20T10:59:00.001-06:00

How To Make Crack Head Pancakes

2007-10-19T11:00:00.000-06:00

clipped from links.zigzo.com

How To: Make Pancakes Like a Crack Head

Ever wanted to make pancakes like your everyday crack head junkie? Well NOW you can! *WITH PICS*

Gather your junkiesque supplies

Cut up your pancake mix (Junk).

Continue….

Pile up your pancake mix.

DON’T EVEN THINK ABOUT IT!

Add 1 bump salt and 1 bump baking powder to crack head mirror.

Next add your water.

After the water put a shot of milk.

The last liquid added is oil. This is optional but if you truly want to make crack head pan cakes, put a double shot.

Now cut everything together. Mix until liquid.

Now for the egg. Take you syringe and poke THROUGH the egg shell. Extract your Egg.

Add the raw egg (crack head style).

After mixed add your pancake mix to your crack spoon. Hold spoon open flame.

Cook both sides! This is raw egg, you don’t want to risk your health.

Done! Breakfast is served and your crack head pancake is now complete. Enjoy the CrackJack

Abstinence Education 4 Girlz and 4 Boyz

2007-09-18T19:39:00.000-06:00

(Warning: May Not Be Work Safe!)

4 Girlz

The IRON HYMEN Abstinence-Only Education Program
Take the IRON HYMEN Abstinence-Only Pledge

4 Boyz

The Sex is for Fags! Abstinence-Only Education Program
The Sex is for Fags! Abstinence-Only Pledge

(Dizzy Dayz made me post this!)

If I'm Going To Hell...

2007-09-12T18:37:00.000-06:00

I might as well die laughing!

YouTube - Modern Day Jesus - Makin' Out

More Surge Please...Mmm Mmm Good

2007-09-12T12:48:00.001-06:00

iSurge - AMERICAblog:

If the surge weren't so serious, these "ads" would be totally funny!

Surge For Sale

2007-09-11T09:11:00.000-06:00

If the Surge were a product, this would be its TV ad - AMERICAblog:

Interesting Drug Bust

2007-09-10T15:44:00.000-06:00

Watch the background carefully. . .

Size Doesn't Matter

2007-09-09T18:41:00.001-06:00

Now. . .back off of Dennis Kucinich:

Red State Update: Larry Craig

2007-08-30T12:44:00.000-06:00

(crossposted at Dizzy Dayz)

Larry Craig

Add to My Profile | More Videos

It all comes out the same hole

2007-08-10T13:04:00.000-06:00

No matter what they say about conservatism, it's like any other thing you eat. It all comes out the same hole! Eat at your own risk! Heartburn from it is like eating spiced food, it is an issue. It can make you sick. Don't eat it! Don't wreck your colon!

No hooking zone

2007-08-01T10:48:00.000-06:00

Dedicated with love to Diaper Dave! Hey Vitty-cent, do you get the family sized box of diapers to fit in with your family values? Just asking...

Gonzo is GONE-O!

2007-07-29T18:35:00.000-06:00

Even the neo-nazis are refusing to defend Fredo! See ya, wouldn't wanna be ya. . .

On Fox News Sunday this morning, former Speaker of the House Newt Gingrich refused to defend Attorney General Alberto Gonzales against accusations that he may have perjured himself before Congress. “It’s very damaging…we badly need an attorney general who is above any question,” said Gingrich. He continued:

Both the president and country are better served if the attorney general is a figure of competence. Sadly, the current attorney general is not seen as any of those things. I think it’s a liability for the president. More importantly, it’s a liability for the United States of America.

Later in the show, host Chris Wallace revealed that no conservative would willingly defend Gonzales on Fox. “By the way, we invited White House officials and Republicans on the Senate Judiciary Committee to defend Attorney General Gonzales,” said Wallace. “We had no takers.” Watch it:

Condi-liscious?

2007-07-23T14:14:00.000-06:00

Thanks to Firedoglake for this little gem

crossposted at Little Purple Fooshballs/Dizzy Dayz

New Terror Alert System

2007-07-13T12:07:00.000-06:00

H/T: BLONDESENSE

clipped from blondesense.blogspot.com

crossposted: The Katrinacrat Blog, Little Purple Fooshballs, Dizzy Dayz

How to catch a Republican

2007-07-10T09:18:00.000-06:00

Just pull on the rope, and you have your very own pet! Everyone can now go out and get their own neocon if they use this very simple trap. Happy hunting folks!

Grammar Jammer

2007-07-08T17:27:00.001-06:00

Donnie! WTF? ? ? ;)

Ride on

2007-06-19T20:09:00.000-06:00

WTF?

Check Out Photos of Web Porn Star Who Played Adam in The Creation Museum Video!

2007-06-15T16:25:00.000-06:00

Eric Linden who starred as Adam in Kentucky's Creation Museum video owned and operated a website called Bedroom Acrobat. (see previous post here.) When the news of Eric Linden's porn site was uncovered The Creation Museum yanked their 15 minute video which contained pictures of actor Eric Linden frolicking naked in a pond with an actress who played Eve. ( private parts covered with Lily Pads!) Eric Linden's site, Bedroom Acrobat was closed immediately.

Here are some archived photos of Eric Linden from The Bedroom Acrobat posing with a drag queen. I don't have to tell ya'll that I could give a flying carp what Eric Linden does, but I am delighted that The Creation Museum has been humiliated. Now, can the right wing get over the dang blow job?

Photos are from this site, The Evangelical Right. Check it out, I am going to have to spring for the book they advertise, the sinner's guide to the Evangelical Right.
Pissed off Patricia at Morning Martini is looking for a good beach read. the sinner's guide to the Evangelical Right may be the ticket.

Cross posted at Live at the Gay Agenda.

Actor Who Plays Adam in Creation Museum Video is Porn Star

2007-06-10T10:47:00.000-06:00

Kentucky's Creation Museum plays a video of a hunky naked guy and a sexy naked girl playing around in a pond full of lily pads. These two beauties are supposed to be Adam and Eve. Well, this whole idea makes me suspicious. First of all, where the hell did all the blonds come from if these two started the entire human species? And really, if God was so brilliant, why the hell did he make just one guy to frolic around by himself in the Garden of Eden and wait until the guy started kvetching to create a woman? Talk about a lack of foresight. And why the hell did he have to make her out of a rib anyway? But I do digress.

It turns out the the actor, Eric Linden, who played Adam in the Creationist film is/was a blogosphere Porn Star on his own website, Bedroom Acrobat. He was depicted on Bedroom Acrobat posing with a drag queen. The Creation Museum yanked the Adam and Eve video to investigate the claims against Eric Linden. The Bedroom Acrobat yanked their site and are regrouping.

That's what the beer is for

2007-06-07T10:20:00.001-06:00

Ladies, if the MakeUp makes you sexy, the beer will make you a goddess! I'm just sayin'...

Got my dancing shoes ready

2007-06-02T10:12:00.000-06:00

Since Pursey is back, I can now show off my dancing shoes I got just for the tent party. These bad boys are made for dancing, and do they have style or what?

I got another pair, and if Bobby or Woody wants to have them, they are welcome to them. These suckas are meant for dancing! Just imagine the look on the faces of others as we walk in with this fashion statement!

How are ya?

2007-06-01T07:54:00.001-06:00

I dunno, I'd change the name if I wanted to keep the Fucking sign.

So Easy A Caveman Can Do It...

2007-05-29T11:06:00.000-06:00

crossposted at dizzydayz

clipped from saintgasoline.com

True Love

2007-05-27T09:31:00.000-06:00

As you glance across the bar, you notice her. It's TRUE LOVE! Love at first sight. There is just something about her that grabs your attention. You just know she's special!

Ah yes, the joys of Love!

How are ya?

2007-05-21T11:51:00.000-06:00

How are ya?

A woman who has been having an affair with a gorilla sez she still loves the critter even though he bit her.

"I go to the zoo almost every day with my husband, and we're always going to see Bokito. I even have pictures and videos from Berlin when he was only four months old," the woman told Dutch mass-circulation daily Telegraaf. Well, no wonder the ape bit her - she drags her husband over to see her paramour.

And talk about rough sex: speaking of Bokito, the woman told the Telegraaf: "He gripped me, sat on me with his full weight and began biting me."

Sounds like one of my ex-wives.

cross posted at Live at the Gay Agenda

Bush Invites Blair for a Sleepover

2007-05-16T22:14:00.000-06:00

One Trick Pony Tony has been invited by One Freedom Fry Short of a Happy Meal Bush for a White House Sleep Over on His Last Visit to the Land of the Fairy Killers. Sleep tight, little boys, and I really hope the bed bugs bite. I hope you get to giggling so much you spew Diet Coke and Chuckee Cheese Pepperoni Pizza out your nozzes 'til, well whatever. Then Laura can step in with the Pretzel finale.

Picture from Adbusters

Tinky Winky Ponders Life Without Foe

2007-05-16T07:46:00.000-06:00

Cross Posted at Live at the Gay Agenda

The new face of Lady Liberty

2007-05-08T04:37:00.000-06:00

Just keep them where they are, if they're that hungry, have no fear. Dubya's buddies will put a McDonalds there soon enough.

“The Statue of Liberty is no longer saying, "Give me your poor, your tired, your huddled masses." She's got a baseball bat and yelling, "You want a piece of me?"”--Robin Williams quotes

Larry, Moe and Curley Explain the Joys of Treachery

2007-04-30T09:01:00.000-06:00

Last night The Three Stooges appeared on 60 Minutes and teach the country how easy it is to be a traitor and live to publish the story. Here are some quick and easy lessons you can learn if you are ever accused of war crimes or the like.

First, know how to get out of doing your horrible deed by making it sound like you were actually being honorable. Pepper in a little pity party if you have to. The rules are simple and go as follows:

Simply repeat these three statements.

1. I was sworn to secrecy.
2. I was doing my job.
3. I was trying to keep my job.

Next you can learn ways of making people think you did something you did not do. The rules are simple and go as follows:

Proudly repeat bullshit like this and then get a little vague.

1. I kept bombs from going off in shopping centers.
2. I kept more airplanes from flying into airports.
3. I kept bridges from being blown up.
4. I can not tell you the specifics.

When accused of torture, or some other unsavory act, get all defensive. Use a loud tone of voice and holler out things like:

1. NOW YOU LISTEN TO ME!!!
2. I DID NOT DO IT!!!
3. I DO NOT DISCUSS THAT!!!!

Then, if you have been wronged, make it clear that the transgressions against you, no matter how minor in the grand scheme of things, appear far worse than your own murderous, illegal and immoral actions. The rules of righteous indignation are simple and are as follows:

Whimper statements like these below in a low tone with eyes burning as if they may tear up at any moment. Throw in a pout or two.

1. I was humiliated.
2. It was the most despicable thing that ever happened to me.
3. It was wrong.
4. IT WAS WRONG!!!!

If all else fails, just play dumb.

Help For Horny Conservative Pups!

2007-04-24T09:39:00.000-06:00

Please click here for more information!

Run Bilbo, Run!

2007-04-24T09:08:00.000-06:00

At Least the Boss Was Satisfied by Gonzales’s Answers

President Bush said Monday that the Congressional testimony of Attorney General Alberto R. Gonzales last week, roundly panned by members of both parties, had “increased my confidence in his ability to do the job.”

But wait just one minute there Bushie!!!

But his statement on Monday was his first direct comment about Mr. Gonzales since the attorney general appeared before the committee, and it was at considerable odds with an overwhelmingly critical assessment of his testimony by members of both parties. It indicated that Mr. Bush, at least for now, has concluded his attorney general can weather the challenge to his leadership at the Justice Department, barring any evidence of wrongdoing.

That challenge had seemed all the more daunting as of Sunday, when Senator Arlen Specter of Pennsylvania, the ranking Republican on the committee whom both sides view as a barometer of support for Mr. Gonzales, appeared on “Fox News Sunday” and said, “The attorney general’s testimony was very, very damaging to his own credibility,” and that his continued tenure was “bad for the Department of Justice.”

Speaking during a short question-and-answer session in the Oval Office, Mr. Bush said of Mr. Gonzales’s performance before the Senate Judiciary Committee, “The attorney general went up and gave a very candid assessment, and answered every question he could possibly answer, honestly answer.”

You really need to start paying attention to your surroundings Dubya! FYI, Gonzo was as inept as you are when it comes to Iraq! Get a clue jackass!

Pastor Ted Haggard Banished

2007-04-19T14:17:00.000-06:00

Pastor Ted Haggard was sent packing and moved to Phoenix, AZ as part of his punishment for his wayward ways for being outed as a gay-male-prostitute seeking meth snorting preacher. As part of his severance package from New Life Church, Pastor Haggard agreed to get the hell out of dodge. Members of his former church in Colorado Springs felt a great relief, believing that now their lives can return to normal. What the heck?

"When he moved out of town today, there was a kind of relief on the part of the church that life can get back to normal," said the Rev. H.B. London, one of three ministers overseeing what has been called Haggard's "restoration." "For the Haggards, it is the beginning of a huge new chapter. It's a brand new start for them, the beginning of a new beginning."

So the church sighed this huge sigh of relief, just as if Jesse James had been sent packing. Why in the world would anyone give a flying carp about where Pastor Haggard lived? Why was his mere presence such a burden to his fellow citizens that as part of his severance he agreed to leave town? This sounds a little old fashioned and extreme if you ask me.

I got this picture from a website called The Weekly Donut. This site is obsessed with putting pictures of donuts on other pictures. Visit The Weekly Donut here.

Good morning VIETRAQ!

2007-04-18T14:22:00.000-06:00

Gooood Morning VIETRAQ! Top of the day to you happy campers here at the IED Ritz Carlton, aka The Sand Box! The liberal biased media is reporting an alleged string of bombings that allegedly killed 127 people across Baghdad Wednesday. Anyone that has kept up with the story out of Iraq, knows that the surge is working.

If that is not enough, that liberal biased media also tries to make us believe that "The carnage underscored the profound insecurity that continues to plague the nation."

But have no fear, Maj. Gen. William B. Caldwell, U.S. military spokesman, takes those dirty unwashed hippies to task and speaks the truth.

"We've seen both inspiring progress and too much evidence that we still face many grave challenges," Maj. Gen. William B. Caldwell, U.S. military spokesman, told reporters Wednesday. "We've always said securing Baghdad would not be easy."

It's not like anyone said that we would be greeted as liberators! We know it's working!

The multiple bombings on Wednesday come a week after a suicide bombing at the Iraqi parliament, inside the highly protected Green Zone.

If you find this to be offensive, then join the crowd. Iraq has become a no win situation, and a debacle that will forever be a black mark on our nation. We cannot allow this to continue, and our troops need to be taken out of that meat grinder of a civil war. To say other wise, is just a way to avoid admitting that the war is a lie, and we should never have gone to Iraq to begin with. We need to bring our troops home now, and end this insanity. If you want to help, click on this:

We the people, have to take charge, and reclaim our nation. We have to let those that we put in office in November, know that we expect them to follow through with our mandate. If we are not listened to, then we must remove them and do it as soon as it can be done. We demand accounting and justice! We demand our country be returned back to us!

REBUKE BUSH!

Funnin' the Fundies

2007-04-17T02:55:00.000-06:00

I wonder if the douchebags ever noticed it. They don't seem to know what happened.

Shout Out To The Boyz!

2007-04-15T16:05:00.000-06:00

This is my inaugural post here on lpf...it might be my last if Donnie doesn't think this is patriotic enough, so please watch this youtube before Donnie busts me down in rank! ***wink***

h/t: Minstrel Boy

How the Hell Does Anyone Send or Recieve 5 Million Emails?

2007-04-13T07:39:00.000-06:00

I don't get it. Rove and the gang claim they have lost 5 million emails. What, the enlarge your parts spam? I mean, how the hell could anyone send or receive 5 million emails, much less lose them? I think that Rove and the gang are addicted to email, look at how they are fixated on their Blackberries.

Jeb Bush is so addicted to his Blackberry when he had his portrait painted he insisted on including his Blackberry in the picture. He made some outrageous claim that he was the first person in government to use a Blackberry or some shit. I think these guys have a serious problem and if they really did lose all their emails they would be locked up in a psych ward, sobbing with a Zoloft drip. I mean look at how Jeb had his Blackberry on the mantle right next to the photo of his family. Christ, what is with these guys?

Good God, Laura Bush Uses Some Poor Kid to Hock Cheap Jewelry

2007-04-12T14:27:00.000-06:00

Laura Bush apparently wears a stretch elephant and American flag bracelet to support the GOP and these Laura Bush bracelets are being hocked here. Hey, since when did the GOP become "America's" party? Hey, is Miss Laura making money off this stuff? And what mother would hand a baby over to a Zombie for a photo-op? Jeeze Louise.

Veto my ass!

2007-04-12T09:17:00.000-06:00

And he wants to veto something? Good Gawd, give that idiot some meds!!! Here's a thought Mr. President, get your head out your ass, and get with the program. A majority of America wants out of Iraq and sees it for the sham that it really is. Get over your ego and bring them home! BTW, GO FUCK YOUR SELF!!!!!!! Speaking seriously as an American that is!

P.S. I hope your wife sleeps with another man!

Where are you Woody Tobias, Jr.

2007-04-10T11:59:00.000-06:00

Get back here, you coward!

How are ya?

2007-04-09T15:22:00.000-06:00

Work got ya down? Here's a cure:

Image courtesy of Sumo

Cross posted HERE and HERE

Blogging against Theocracy

2007-04-09T02:53:00.000-06:00

Need I say any more?

How are ya?

2007-04-06T15:55:00.000-06:00

185 Iraqi War Vets walk into a Saudi bar.
Bartender sez "we don't serve anybody, we don't carry liquor."
The War Vets say "Well, can we have one of them packs of camels?"

One Tin Soldier: A message to learn

2007-04-03T02:26:00.000-06:00

A lesson to be learned, from a blast from the past. Thank you Delores Taylor and Tom Laughlin. Long live Billy Jack! Speak up and use your voice, for we are now under attack from within. Impeachment should not be off the table. It is our duty to call those that would ruin our country out on the carpet. NO ONE IS ABOVE THE LAW! So what say you people, shall you get your Billy Jack on?

Now is the time to make a change in this nation. Don't sit and think your voice has no meaning. Step up and be the change you want. Show them that "We the People" still exists and we shall not go away. Be that "One Tin soldier!" You are the future of America. I did not serve in the Marines and have many generations of my family serve, to have some zealots rob us of what many have died for. Rise up and reclaim your nation!

One Tin Soldier (The Legend of Billy Jack)
by Lambert-Potter, sung by Coven

Listen, children, to a story
That was written long ago,
'Bout a kingdom on a mountain
And the valley-folk below.

On the mountain was a treasure
Buried deep beneath the stone,
And the valley-people swore
They'd have it for their very own.

Go ahead and hate your neighbor,
Go ahead and cheat a friend.
Do it in the name of Heaven,
You can justify it in the end.
There won't be any trumpets blowing
Come the judgement day,
On the bloody morning after....
One tin soldier rides away.

So the people of the valley
Sent a message up the hill,
Asking for the buried treasure,
Tons of gold for which they'd kill.

Came an answer from the kingdom,
"With our brothers we will share
All the secrets of our mountain,
All the riches buried there."

Go ahead and hate your neighbor,
Go ahead and cheat a friend.
Do it in the name of Heaven,
You can justify it in the end.
There won't be any trumpets blowing
Come the judgement day,
On the bloody morning after....
One tin soldier rides away.

Now the valley cried with anger,
"Mount your horses! Draw your sword!"
And they killed the mountain-people,
So they won their just reward.

Now they stood beside the treasure,
On the mountain, dark and red.
Turned the stone and looked beneath it...
"Peace on Earth" was all it said.

Go ahead and hate your neighbor,
Go ahead and cheat a friend.
Do it in the name of Heaven,
You can justify it in the end.
There won't be any trumpets blowing
Come the judgement day,
On the bloody morning after....
One tin soldier rides away.

Go ahead and hate your neighbor,
Go ahead and cheat a friend.
Do it in the name of Heaven,
You can justify it in the end.
There won't be any trumpets blowing
Come the judgement day,
On the bloody morning after....
One tin soldier rides away.

Be sure to visit Tom and Delores. As the song says:

Go ahead and hate your neighbor,
Go ahead and cheat a friend.
Do it in the name of Heaven,
You can justify it in the end.
There won't be any trumpets blowing
Come the judgement day,
On the bloody morning after....
One tin soldier rides away.

Hat Tip to Pursey for the idea.

UPDATE: Here is the song for anyone that never heard it, and for those that know it well.

McCain: Not the brightest crayon in the box

2007-04-02T04:58:00.000-06:00

Whoo, that John McSurge is one seriously deranged lunatic! Recently, McNutter made the claim that "President Bush’s escalation in Iraq is going so well", “General Petraeus goes out there almost every day in an unarmed humvee.” and there “are neighborhoods in Baghdad where you and I could walk through those neighborhoods, today.”

Yesterday, Sen. John McCain (R-AZ) told CNN that that President Bush’s escalation in Iraq is going so well, “General Petraeus goes out there almost every day in an unarmed humvee.” On Monday, he told radio host Bill Bennett that there “are neighborhoods in Baghdad where you and I could walk through those neighborhoods, today.”

This morning, during an interview with McCain, CNN’s John Roberts rebutted McCain’s assertions, stating, “I checked with General Petraeus’s people overnight and they said he never goes out in anything less than an up-armored humvee.” He added that a new report by retired Gen. Barry McCaffrey “said no Iraqi government official, coalition soldier, diplomat reporter could walk the streets of Baghdad without heavily armed protection.”

Faced with overwhelming evidence that he was wrong, McCain denied he’d ever said it: “Well, I’m not saying they could go without protection. The President goes around America with protection. So, certainly I didn’t say that.” Watch it:

So now the always clueless McJackass went to Iraq, and took that walk! But that walk is nothing like he claimed could happen.

After a heavily guarded walk through a newly fortified Baghdad market, Sen. John McCain declared that the American public was not getting "a full picture" of the progress unfolding in Iraq.

McCain (Ariz.), who is seeking the Republican presidential nomination, cited a drop in murders, the creation of a constellation of joint U.S.-Iraqi military outposts and a rise in intelligence tips as signs of the progress.

"These and other indications are reason for cautious optimism," McCain said, voicing an observation increasingly heard from U.S. officials.

The senator and three other Republican members of Congress appeared most impressed by their visit to Shorja market, citing the hour they spent there as proof that Baghdad was getting safer under a nearly seven-week-old security offensive.

OMFG!! Heavily Guarded? What about that walk in the park kinda trip through the market McFlake? Wanna know how heavily guarded he was? Well lets take a look at what Think Progress has to say about it. This is classic!

Sen. John McCain strolled briefly through an open-air market in Baghdad today in an effort to prove that Americans are “not getting the full picture” of what’s going on in Iraq.

NBC’s Nightly News provided further details about McCain’s one-hour guided tour. He was accompanied by “100 American soldiers, with three Blackhawk helicopters, and two Apache gunships overhead.” Still photographs provided by the military to NBC News seemed to show McCain wearing a bulletproof vest during his visit. Watch it:

Shrub sees da light

2007-03-31T20:35:00.000-06:00

Well whaddaya know. . .Apparently hell must've froze over last night:

Why men shouldn't take messages

2007-03-31T10:20:00.000-06:00

So where is that college at any way?

Denny's Chin Prevents Jaw from Hitting Lap After Learning that Mark Foley May be Charged with Cyber Predatory Crimes

2007-03-28T09:18:00.000-06:00

Alberto Gonzales is running around the country blathering on and on about his committment to capture and kill cyber predators. Meanwhile, Denny's buddy, Mark "Maf54" Foley checked out of rehab and is facing possible criminal charges in Florida for his online sexual chats with underaged male Pages. Oh, the irony.

More Republican Family Values

2007-03-27T19:04:00.000-06:00

Alberto Obsessed with Online Predators Ignores Case of Sexual Abuse in Texas Boy's Prison

2007-03-27T09:21:00.000-06:00

Ya'll, there is nothing funny about this story, it is sick and sad on every level. Alberto Gonzales, under fire for his role in the ousting of 8 US Attorneys, has vowed to keep his focus on tracking down and prosecuting online sexual predators.

Meanwhile, back at the ranch, Texas US Attorney Johnny Sutton and Attorney General Alberto Gonzales failed to prosecute a case of widespread sexual abuse reported in the Texas Youth Commission prison for teenage boys in Pyote, Texas. Boys at the prison accused guards of rousting them from their sleep for all night sex parties. Boys reported that their prison terms were extended if the were reluctant to participate or if they participated willingly. Records show that boys prison terms were extended without cause. It was a Catch 22.

US Attorney Johnny Sutton used all sorts of excuses for not prosecuting the case against the prison guards, one excuse which sounds eerily similar to BushCo's definition of torture. Sutton claims that the boys did not experience "physical pain," therefore the abuse was not abuse. In reality, the Texas Ranger who investigated the reports of abuse and presented his case just picked an inconvenient time to do so, it was in the middle of Republican Rick Perry's campaign for Governor and would not have looked good in the media.

So Alberto may be in Colorado high schools chatting it up with teenage girls about how he plans to protect them from online sexual predators, but he allows sexual predators in prisons for teenage boys to run the joint and abuse these already troubled young men with impunity.

We gotta protect those family values!

2007-03-25T13:23:00.000-06:00

Those gays are out to get us! Please protect our family values!

Gonzo's ass is looking mighty tasty now

2007-03-20T07:09:00.000-06:00

Yum, yum!! It's feeding time!

In a sign of Republican despair, GOP political strategists on Capitol Hill said that it is too late for Gonzales' departure to head off a full-scale Democratic investigation into the motives and timing behind the firing of eight U.S. attorneys.

"Democrats smell blood in the water, and (Gonzales') resignation won't stop them," said a well-connected Republican Senate aide. "And on our side, no one's going to defend him. All we can do is warn Democrats against overreaching."

A main reason Gonzales is finding few friends even among Republicans is that he has long been regarded with suspicion by conservatives who have questioned his ideological purity. In the past, these conservatives warned the White House against nominating him for the Supreme Court. Now they're using the controversy over the firing of eight federal prosecutors to take out their pent-up frustrations with how he has handled his leadership at Justice and how the White House has treated Congress.

Got Osama?

2007-03-17T15:43:00.000-06:00

So what's up with that Osama dude now Georgie?

Ewwww, get a room already!!!

2007-03-14T12:29:00.000-06:00

I won't ask, if you don't tell.

Sure you're reformed

2007-03-13T13:13:00.000-06:00

Right dude, and that ain't beer in front of you right? Nor is the iced down bucket in the back as full of beer as you are full of shit! Gotcha dude!

Just refrain from doing things like this. It not only makes you look stupid, but it just scares the shit out of everybody!

And one more thing, stop this shit you freaking perv!

Meet the neocon base

2007-03-08T14:56:00.000-06:00

Meet da base!

Conservative
Confederate
Confused
Constipated (mentally)
Controlling
Conflicting

What flakes they are!

Act while supplies last

2007-03-06T02:57:00.000-06:00

Come one, come all! Don't be left out in the cold this election cycle. Act now and receive the best talking points and spew the 2008 Presidential hopefuls have to offer. If you are one of the first 2 million to order, you will receive a free barf bag (Ann Coulter's face).

Make one of two choices

For those that are not really up on their technology level:

For those that have managed to jump into the 20th century:

Don't allow your ears to miss all the great sound bytes, order now and assure your place at the emergency room. Be the envy of all your neighbors, when they see your bleeding eardrums!

Just one time.....

2007-02-26T10:15:00.001-06:00

Anything to keep Iraq out of the headlines huh? So goes life in our country, but just one time....

Bush the warmonger

2007-02-24T16:12:00.000-06:00

For those that still don't believe that Bush and the gang are warmonger idiots.....

You are no George Washington you idiot

2007-02-20T04:02:00.000-06:00

The audacity of this out of touch maniac knows no bounds. The Worst President in U.S. History tried to compare the American Revolution to the War on Terror! Captain clueless made this stupid comment on Presidents' day of all days. If that was not bad enough, he described George Washington as "the first George W." You George Bush, are no George Washington! Washington helped to usher in freedom and democracy in this country. Like the clueless and malignant vampire that you are, you have taken to relieving this nation of those very same freedoms. America is now a divided nation. America has lost it's credibility on the world scene. America has invaded another county without being provoked by that nation. America is now viewed as an aggresive and hostile nation. That is your legacy George W. Bush! You are no George Washington you idiot son of an idiot!

President Bush honored the 275th birthday of the nation's first president on Monday, likening George Washington's long struggle that gave birth to a nation to the war on global terrorism.

"Today, we're fighting a new war to defend our liberty and our people and our way of life," said Bush, standing in front of Washington's home and above a mostly frozen Potomac River.

"And as we work to advance the cause of freedom around the world, we remember that the father of our country believed that the freedoms we secured in our revolution were not meant for Americans alone."

Bush chose the national Presidents Day holiday to make his first visit as president to Mount Vernon. He and first lady
Laura Bush helped lay a wreath at Washington's tomb, then the president gave a speech from a platform on the bowling green lawn of the estate.

"I feel right at home here. After all, this is the home of the first George W. I thank President Washington for welcoming us today. He doesn't look a day over 275 years old," Bush said to laughter.

And just to make sure that the disgracing of our first President was complete, Captain Clueless had to throw this one in. Like he has tried to have decency or honor.

"Over the centuries, America has succeeded because we have always tried to maintain the decency and the honor of our first president," Bush said.

I guess this is an answer to my question I have asked many times. Is there no level that this lunatic will not go to disgrace this nation?

Related: Hear about it from the douchebag himself.

Frog march those assholes

2007-02-19T05:51:00.000-06:00

I agree with John, PLEASE?

Dubyaisms

2007-02-13T10:12:00.000-06:00

From PTCruiser:

"And there is distrust in Washington. I am surprised, frankly, at the amount of distrust that exists in this town. And I'm sorry it's the case, and I'll work hard to try to elevate it."--George W. Bush, interview on National Public Radio, Jan. 29, 2007

From Dubyaisms:

"I'm a uniter not a divider. That means when it comes time to sew up your chest cavity, we use stitches as opposed to opening it up." -- Bush, on David Letterman, March 2, 2000. (the audience booed)

"I propose that every city have a telephone number 119 -- for dyslexics who have an emergency." -- George Junior

"I hope to show Hispanics that Republicans do have a heart, but I also want to send a message to people from around the country as to how to pick up the Hispanic vote" -- George Junior

"It's hard to usher in the responsibility era if you behave irresponsibly." -- Junior, aiming at Clinton but backfiring.

"There ought to be limits to freedom. We're aware of this site, and this guy is just a garbage man, that's all he is." -- George Jr., discussing a web site that parodies him

From Humour-Dubyaisms:

"If we don't succeed, we run the risk of failure."...George W. Bush, Jr.

"Republicans understand the importance of bondage between a mother and child."...Governor George W. Bush, Jr.

"I stand by all the misstatements that I've made."...Governor George W. Bush, Jr. to Sam Donaldson 8/17/93

"Mars is essentially in the same orbit...Mars is somewhat the same distance from the Sun, which is very important. We have seen pictures where there are canals, we believe, and water. If there is water, that means there is oxygen. If oxygen, that means we can breathe."...Governor George W. Bush, Jr., 8/11/94

"The Holocaust was an obscene period in our nation's history. I mean in this century's history. But we all lived in this century. I didn't live in this century."...Governor George W. Bush, Jr., 9/15/95

"I believe we are on an irreversible trend toward more freedom and democracy - but that could change."...Governor George W. Bush, Jr., 5/22/98

"People that are really very weird can get into sensitive positions and have a tremendous impact on history."...Governor George W. Bush, Jr.

"The American people would not want to know of any misquotes that George Bush may or may not make."...Governor George W. Bush, Jr.

"[It's] time for the human race to enter the solar system." ...Governor George W. Bush, Jr

You might be a redneck if.....

2007-02-07T14:38:00.000-06:00

Winger: They are trying to take our second ammendment rights away!!!!

LPF: Who would that be?

Winger: The Democrats!

LPF: Oh really?

Winger: That's why we have to vote republican!

LPF: Are you off your meds?

Winger: Then why all the gun control laws they try to push?

LPF: Okay, I am going to tell you this real slow so even you can understand this. When you make claims, try to at least research what you are trying to relay. At least have the decency to read something even if it is a comic book on the subject. If you want to get mad about gun control, first look at your own party! Start with James Brady to begin with. He became an ardent supporter of gun control after being disabled for life after getting shot during an assassination attempt on President Reagan! That is your fellow republican you have to question there. Get it?

Besides, anyone that feels they need something the size of a RPG or bigger to protect their homestead, is not only a fucking lunatic, but really needs to think about moving the hell out of that neighborhood!

Please don't liberate me!

2007-02-03T13:50:00.000-06:00

Just don't do it!! I am fine...really I am! Just don't liberate me.

Homeland Security huh?

2007-01-29T13:20:00.000-06:00

Yep. this is what I see security as under Dubya!

Way to go Georgie!! Do we feel safer yet?

Not bad for a lie

2007-01-29T12:40:00.000-06:00

Dirty low life bastard. This man sucks!

Headlines we would like to see

2007-01-29T12:21:00.000-06:00

That's what I'm talking about! It's either that or ITMFA.

Condi says...

2007-01-19T16:21:00.000-06:00

That Condi and her hubby......er I mean her Preznit.

Little Green What?

2007-01-19T16:04:00.000-06:00

Charles Johnson, taking creepy and stupid to a new level.

The people have spoken

2007-01-14T05:09:00.000-06:00

The people have spoken. We knocked on the door, but he ain't answering.

But I'm the decider!!!

2007-01-14T05:01:00.000-06:00

Still not coming to grips with reality!

If you can't make it in the Marines

2007-01-09T11:07:00.000-06:00

If you can't make it in the Marines, there is always the Army!

Hat Tip to Dizzy Dezzi.

Never underestimate the power of makeup

2007-01-09T10:27:00.000-06:00

Before and after:

Before and after again:

The ultimate before and after:

Never underestimate!

We got Da Dollahs!!!!

2007-01-02T16:33:00.000-06:00

And now a message from our Executive Vice CEO:

That labia biased media

2007-01-01T00:51:00.000-06:00

Is someone taking the rating wars to a whole new level?

The Horror

2006-12-30T15:30:00.000-06:00

Quick, call 911.

Abortion

2006-12-28T03:12:00.000-06:00

The sound will eventually go away.

Gay Agenda

2006-12-26T19:58:00.000-06:00

You were warned! They're gonna recruit the planet. Just watch.

Flag Desecration

2006-12-24T11:30:00.000-06:00

America, love it or leave it! You libruls are insane!

Brainwashed

2006-12-23T08:48:00.000-06:00

OH NO! They are brainwashing the kids. Please make it stop!

Ann Coulter: More AP photoshops

2006-12-22T12:50:00.000-06:00

This is insane! Please stop this insanity! They tried to pass this one off as our beloved Ann.

This is an insult to all of us real Americans!! Look at what she really looks like...

You see? Do you see what I mean? They hate America!!!!!!!!

Photo shopping by the AP

2006-12-22T10:49:00.000-06:00

The AP is at it again. I have found another Photoshop job done by them. Here is the proof!

Look at this photo!

This is an outrage! I demand justice and an accounting by the AP. You owe us the truth. I have found the original photo, and it is far from the Photoshopped version that the AP has used. I await your apology!

Here is the real photo:

THIS IS AN OUTRAGE!!!!!!